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is he a good baby

Jessica Lorren Photography{photo by Jessica Lorren}

I remember vividly people asking me just after both boys were born “is he a good baby?”… it felt like that question was asked a hundred times a day.  I never really knew what to say… yes?? aren’t all babies just by being babies inherently “good”??   But I think what everyone was really asking, was if they were easy.  And if they were easy then I guessed you were doing something right, and I so desperately wanted to be doing everything right.  Or at least close.  Or at least appear like it.

But so much of it is a crapshoot.  Sometimes kids are good sleepers, sometimes your baby is sick all of the time, sometimes they have reflux, sometimes your baby is an absolute and utter dream, sometimes they cry all night/day and you never get an answer as to why.  It doesn’t have much to do with you at all it seems.  It’s that loss of control that can be so unnerving as a new mom.  Or at least that was true for me.

Really I had no idea what I was doing.  I am still winging it, asking my mother and mother in law a hundred questions a week.  I’m trying to find my footing every day… as my kids grow up and change and throw me for new loops.  But when they were babies that constant question drove me a little nuts.  It’s funny how no one really asks “is he a good toddler?” because, LOL.  ha.

I guess what this post is saying that if you are in the thick of this newborn haze, and maybe you got an”easy” baby…or maybe you didn’t.  Either way, you’re doing the best you can, and that’s better than good.  Your baby is good, even if they never sleep or cry non-stop. Both of my kids stretched me in their newborn stages; given me patience I didn’t know I had and had me praying more earnestly and honestly.   I found a lot of peace in knowing God had his reasons for why this baby was given to me.  entrusted to me.  I rested in the fact that none of us are perfect mothers, but we are their mothers, and sometimes that’s one in the same.

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6 Comments

  • Reply Kelly

    amen amen amen!!! i most certainly agree all babies are good (can you imagine someone answering “no” to that?!)

    “I found a lot of peace in knowing God had his reasons for why this baby was given to me. entrusted to me. I rested in the fact that none of us are perfect mothers, but we are their mothers, and sometimes that’s one in the same.” <– love.

    May 5, 2017 at 10:39 am
  • Reply Whitney

    Thank you so much for this post! I follow your blog and am a new mom. I just had a small breakdown today after a lady at the mall today commented on how small my baby is for his age. My son was born almost 3 months premature and is such a little fighter. He is small for his actual age of 4 months but is the perfect size for his adjusted age of around 2 months. He was due March 3 and was born December 14. I think all of us mommas can feel inadequate at times and this post was such a sweet reminder that God gives us exactly what we need when we need it. So thank you!

    May 5, 2017 at 1:12 pm
  • Reply Amy Grace Duncan

    “Loss of control” is the biggest lesson I’ve learned as a mom. It’s not a lesson I wanted to learn but I’m glad that God is teaching me through it. Thanks for sharing this post that we all need to read!

    May 5, 2017 at 4:30 pm
  • Reply Owen Davis

    This is so true! I have a 10 week old and get asked this question ALL the time. I’m like, well she’s perfect to me but she does cry sometimes and still wakes up during the night… but isn’t that what newborns do? Followed by the question “are you breastfeeding?” which I totally don’t think is anyone’s business!! We are all just doing the best we can <3

    May 6, 2017 at 7:50 am
  • Reply Stephanie

    This post brought a few tears. Thanks for putting this sweet reminder out there. Being a mom is hard sometimes. I struggle daily with my patience and expectations. Thank you bringing me back to square one.

    May 6, 2017 at 6:53 pm
  • Reply Bruna

    Love this post so much Sarah! I know you instantly helped tons of new mamas by sharing this because it is so true!! That question can easily bring in Mom guilt if you are having a tough stretch and it’s so important for us mamas to share our experiences and thoughts in this community to lift each other up when we are down.

    xox
    B

    May 16, 2017 at 4:09 pm
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