10 little tips for a happy marriage

J McLaughlin{photo by shannon kirsten}J.McLaughlin J McLaughlin longboat key

{photo by my husband on our seventh anniversary (; }

{I’ve worn this beautiful J.McLaughlin Simmons dress (c/o) to the theatre (with steve madden heels) and to the beach(with jack rogers) – such a pretty print and so versatile}

Last week JB and I celebrated seven years!  It’s gone by in a blink.  I know many have been following along since the nearly the beginning of that journey.  Since a month after we married I started this blog.  While I’m no where close to a marriage expert, and make more than my fair share of mistakes, I thought I’d share what has helped us.  I think it’s been a very happy seven years!  Truly the best years of my life.

  1.  When we had pre marital counseling with our pastor, one of the biggest “rules” we gleaned from that was to keep your arguments with each other.  If you confide in your family member or friend, they are naturally protective of you and their opinion of your spouse changes which may not be fair… meanwhile the two of you make up.  If you need a third opinion, there’s always a counseling.
  2. Discuss purchases.  We talk over any over $50 purchase with each other and have from the start.  This also helps to avoid dumb/impulsive purchases.
  3. I read this one book when I was first married that said you have to have the same hobbies.  I was like nooooooo because most sports just do not compute up here.  But I don’t think that’s true for us.  or for a happy marriage.  We enjoy plenty of things as a couple, but there are some things neither of us are ever going to be into.  Why force it?  Instead I think celebrating each others victories of those hobbies works for us.  Or occasionally going along for the golf ride (;
  4. We always kiss each other good night.  I remember my parents doing this growing up, and it’s one of those things that no matter how tired you are, it matters.
  5. When you’re upset with each other, so mad and it’s hard to shake off, often times a hug cools you down.  It sounds so dumb at the time, but I swear it does the trick.
  6. Always be in each others corner.
  7. I really can’t stop telling people how good of a friend/husband/father JB is.  And I overhear JB saying the same kind of things to other people.  It’s not that we are perfect parents/spouses/friends but we generally see each other in good lights.  And we tell other people!  I can’t help myself.  ha.
  8. No name calling.  Fight fair.
  9. I have zero problem communicating to JB when I’m disappointed or upset with him.  I don’t hold that stuff in.  It’s never good if I do, and I think that’s where bitterness starts to grow.
  10. Celebrate every milestone, and success together.  Cry when they cry.  Don’t take yourself too seriously.  Pray together.  It changes everything. And love your spouse like crazy!

And also, what do I know what’s right for y’all?!  Find what works for your relationship.

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